How many things are best done naked, excluding “you know what”? Taking a shower? Good answer. Sleeping? I learned in the army; sleep naked to make the best use of your body heat. What else? Suntan bed? Questionable. Here’s one I thought of – weighing yourself.
Seems obvious, weighing yourself, but what makes that such a good answer? Let’s say you have a doctor’s appointment. The nurse calls you away from reading “Family Life,” and takes you down the hall to a little room with scales. Within one second of your shoes touching the platform, the nurse has noted your weight on a clipboard – scribbled there for nobody to ever look at again.
So, is that a problem? Probably not, unless you gain twenty pounds in three weeks and they notice it. That could be “sudden weight gain,” and open the door to a lot of questions like, “Have you had Marie Callender over for dinner too many times recently? So, how does one approach this? Here’s what I do. The morning of the appointment I weigh myself naked. Then, at the doctor’s office, before I step on the scale, I kick off my shoes (I purposely wear boat shoes) and put my wallet, cell phone, watch, keys, and any dog treats that may be in my pockets onto the table next to the scale. Then, I tell the nurse, “I weighed exactly 179 at home today.” She will shrug and write down what the scale says any way. So far, no doctor has ever accused me of “sudden weight gain.” One time a nurse asked me if I’d been shoplifting when I pulled a set of salt and pepper shakers out of my pocket. Oh, I thought of one other thing best done naked. Having a liver transplant. I did mine naked, and here I am five years later, doing fine.